Lest anyone assume I woke-up this morning wearing my Grouchy Pants or have overindulged on a breakfast of Cranky Flakes, allow me to clarify that I am actually quite jolly and chipper as is most often the case in the AM hours–before the real world comes along to slap me in the face and wring-the-merry from my smiley face.
Nevertheless, there are those things that gnaw and grate. Drive-by moments that come along to poke and irritate, despite all good intentions. That rub against the conscience–sometimes in the background, other times in the forefront–but always there somewhere, ready to jump and churn at the first not so gentle nudge.
It started this morning with a Styrofoam coffee cup on my neighbors lawn. I spied it from my kitchen window. A startling, heinously deposited object of stark, non-bio degradable ugliness discarded on Mr. R’s hard-earned and carefully tended square of sod heaven. The sight of which launched me directly into Peeve #1:
Littering boobs who seem to think trash cans were designed as unnecessary ornamentation. Honestly, but I despise litter in all of its hideous forms. No excuses or attempts at rationalization accepted. It’s disgusting.
It is in fact the aforementioned despicable crime that leads me directly into this companion peeve to #1, which is Peeve #2:
Pet owners who walk their dogs (purposely steered their pooches beyond the bounds of their own neighborhood) with the deliberate intent of “Poop and Run.” No doubt you’ve seen them, bag-less dog walkers who pick-up speed should they spy a previously unobserved witness to their dastardly deeds.
Of course thoughts of pooping naturally lead me to considerations of eating, thus Peeve #3:
Foods with healthy sounding names that are anything but healthy. For example Nutri-Grain, or the uber appealing Nature Valley. A wise choice for those in pursuit of good health? ACK!!!! NO! NO! Lies, all lies! Both contain Fructose (HIGH Fructose in some cases.) Fructose, as many of you know, is the REIGNING DEVIL of bad horrifying ingredients. To quote Dr. Mercola of #1 Natural Health Website, “Fructose is the NUMBER ONE source of calories in the US. An ingredient that is found in virtually all processed foods cannot be considered “moderate.” Even most infant formulas contain the sugar equivalent of one can of Coca-Cola, which helps explain how six-month old babies can be obese.” I realize that not everyone cares to be known as the Food Nazi, as my own wiseacre family has titled moi, but Jeezaloo, how about food manufactures ease-up on the blatant trickery toward consumers who really do care to improve their diets and chose wisely. If it says NATURE or NUTRI on the label it should be a rule that, yeah, it really is. (BTW, a good rule to keep in mind when scanning the ingredient panel–beware the “toses,” they’re all stinkers. Aka, Fructose, Maltose, Sucrotose, etc.)
Needless to say, such talk of devious deception leads me straight into Peeve#4:
People who lecture against talking Religion and Politics and then do so themselves. You know the type. They make a grandiose point of their peacekeeping rule of excluding those potentially one thousand percent quarenteed heat producing topics from all social conversation, but then proceed to poke sharpened and poisonous barbs into aforementioned gentle and purposely civil conversation. I think it’s safe to say that the majority of us have very strong opinions of Religion & Politics, thus there are generally no allowances for slip-in, snide references, or drop and run deliveries (see Peeve #2) of said topics.
Okay,okay, simmer down, I hear ya. Enough of the cyber whining– I get it. Still, I know you have plenty of peeves yourself. I can hear them knocking around in your head, so here’s your chance to pass them along (and maybe even get a soothing touch of sympathy). Large, small, or passionately festering, the floor is now open. Let er rip 😀
Barbara Forte Abate 
Oh Barbara that is funny. I’m glad you got that all off your chest, you have every right to be peeved by all of those. The only peeve that springs to mind for me is that my MIL sees when I’m online and thinks it’s time to chat. I just can’t switch those buttons every time to show I’m offline. I guess I need to find out how to do if permanently and tell her I’m turning over a new off-line leaf 🙂
I’m so glad you mention the chatty MIL! I always feel like such a meanie for switching into “invisible woman” status when I’m sweeping through on social networks. Okay, so yes, they are SOCIAL gathering places, but it seems I’m always on-the-fly and so often don’t have time to chat.
And the thing is, it’s not hard to clip a little plastic thing-y to your dog’s leash and carry baggies with you everywhere. And if you accidentally run out of baggies, you can always use a couple leaves to scootch the offending deposit up under some bushes or something where at least no one will step in it. Use your heads, people!
Exactly, relatively painless and simple! I am so horrified lest someone think I’m walking my dog sans bag, I tend to furl it like a flag in my leash-less hand. (See, see how good and responsible I am. I have a bag, I have a bag!) I’ve stepped in enough dog poo to be slightly crazed on this topic :-O
lawd lawd do you really want a look inside my crazy pea-head! Laughing —
but there are the obvious ones that do not seem to be obvious to others: people who talk on their cells in the gym -while on the treadmill, etc — I turn my music all the way up to drown them out. Geez. Okay, walking at 2.0 on the treadmill while screaming into your phone, or worse on speaker-phone, ain’t working out nothing but your flappity ass tongue.
Leaf Blowers – HATE HATE them — this is a quite serene forested cove – why do you need to blow your danged leaves and upset the balance of quiet and serene? And it’s always you “Part Timers” – not us “full time residents” – lawd!
Commercials at Theaters – OMG! We have commercials everywhere, now at the movies – really gets my goat – movie ticket prices are high and then we have to sit through commercials! _ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHH
I will stop here *laugh*
*Laugh, laugh, choking laughing toooo hard*
Good gracious, but yes! Those cell phone crazies who not only yakey yak without ceasing, but who feel the need to share their conversations with the world at large. What the heck is everyone talking about like Secret Service Agents minus the secret? I think it’s especially sad when I see mothers walking their babies with one hand on the carriage and the other plugging their cell phone into their head like a life line. Jeez, what happened to talking to your child about the birds in the trees and the flowers and the bees …
What’s more, Commercials in Theaters are fattening–at least they are for me, since I take it as my cue to go refill my popcorn in order to avoid having to sit through them. The only acceptable commercials during movies are those they used to play “back-in-the-day” during intermissions at the Drive-in. The ones with the dancing hot-dogs that jumped into waiting buns, and the chorus line of ice cream bars … 😀
YES on those commercials – because those were for the concessions – but the other commercials – ARRGH ENNNNGHHH UNNNGHHHHHHH!
Drives me batty, too, when someone talks on the phone while someone is waiting on them, or cutting their hair, or whatever- how rude!
Agreed, the rudeness is beyond belief. They had to put up a sign in our local Post Office that says customers talking on their phones will not be served. To think they even have to TELL people something that SHOULD be common courtesy, because these incessant talkers haven’t the sense to figure how incredibly RUDE it is to discuss Jethro’s outbreak of shingles when they’re buying stamps!
I totally agree! It is insane what people will talk about in public, too – on their phones… Does it make them feel important? In demand?
What, Laird?! You mean they really aren’t important and in demand?
LOL
A good rant is necessary now and then to clean out the pipes (whatever they are).
How about the guy on the freeway that goes around you and then slows ten miles below what you were doing and you have to then go around him just to stay in the flow.
Or, the guy walking down the aisle in the supermarket talking to himself (until you see he has a bluetooth in his ear), asking his ear, what applesauce-cinnamon or plain, which type of pasta (semolina or not), or what brand of sugar, or, , ,etc. – stupidity. Does he really need to confer on some pretty basic stuff for every item he buys.
Ahhh, that did made me feel better.
Bad drivers rate their very own ten page rant for sure, Cora! Especially when you consider how often careless drivers are responsible for the ten car pile-up, but then never seem to end up in the thick of it themselves. Every time I go out in the car lately, it seems I come back spitting nails and thinking homicidal thoughts.
Oh lordy, but I have to laugh at your description of those bluetooth crazies. One of the ushers in my church has a “permanent” bluetooth plugged in his ear and I want to ask him some Sunday if God is calling to let him know where to seat people. It’s all just so silly. Shoppers are some of the worst, since as you mention, “it’s basic stuff” people. Hum…would it be an exaggeration to say that over dependence on cell phones is working to make people stupid?
Funny, thoughts of pooping can lead me directly into thoughts on politics, without pausing for thoughts of food.
Just saying.
Bahahahaha! You’re a hoot, girl! That brings to mind one of hubby’s favorite quotes (The one I pretend I don’t think is funny, but *laughing, snorting, honking inside*), “Politics is like a cesspool, all the big chunks always float to the top.”
Minivans are like haemorrhoids, sooner or later every a$$&%#@ gets one.
With bumper stickers that say “My child is an honor student at Ignoramus Elementary School,” and “VOTE for IMA CROOK.”
I can’t think of any peeves offhand (but I have many, many…no worries) but reading all of yours gave me a laugh – good pet peeves, Barbara! I agree with all of them!
It’s probably a good thing if your peeves aren’t immediately coming to mind, Laird, because once they start peculating they’re hard to shut off.
My rants include littering as well Barbara. We live off a county Farm to Market road in between two towns and it just happens we apparently have the perfect spot in front of our home out in the ditch to clean out one’s vehicle of fast food cups, wrappers, bags, beer cans, bottles and you name it. The only thing so far we have not found seems to be a used condom, am waiting for that one to show up though!
My particular pet peeve though being a lover of books, and a person who has too many both on my shelves and on my Kindle, is people who go to book expos/book signings/publishers and authors book giveaways and then blog about having too many books to read! I am of the mind that no one held them at gunpoint and made them either get the books free and bring them home in suitcase loads or buy them or accept them to review so they need to stop complaining and stop HOARDING!
Not only does it irritate me, but when I think of all the people who cannot afford to buy a book to read much less able to get stacks of them free, it also gives me a bad taste in my mouth because greed in any form is rather tasteless.
Jeezaloo, but the thought of used condoms out there in the ditch remind me of yet ANOTHER peeve: Tampons on the beach! What the hell? Just what the hell?
Ah yes, those freebie coveting,greedy grabber hoarders, who as they pile their piles and grow their mountains, then feel compelled to complain about their greed fueled accumulations. That’s surely a sickness, and one that rears it’s ugly head whenever something FREE is involved. Pitiful!
How about the clueless individual who butts into your quite serious conversation and diverts it to his own pathetic, often told, personal tales of woe. Slow roast over a hot fire, and i am not talking about moi.
Arg, we have one of those in the family. The kids have coined him “Babeeb the Conversation Stealer!” In some ways I’m amazed how these types are so skilled in turning any topic around to be about them. And oh, but the wisdom they carry on their shoulders is massive, when you consider that they know everything about everything! I always think conversation stealers would be a little easier to take (emphasis on “Little”) if they occasionally switched from Talk Mode to Listening Mode, but nope, it’s all about them.
Thanks for visiting, Richard 😀
I am with you on the poop-and-run dog walkers. We had a problem with one of our neighbors (in a cul-de-sac of 8 houses) letting her dog run out her front door and poop in the neighbors’ lawns. This what we did. We scooped up the poop and made a pile on her doorstep. We had to do this a few times before she got the hint, but she quit letting her dog do what he was doing.
My pet peeve concerning cats in densely populated areas is cat owners who allow Puss N’ Boots to roam the neighborhood. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to de-cat-crap my flower bed. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to scrub my stoop (and sometimes my front door) after kitty decided to spray them to mark her territory.
Following advice I read online, I tried to deter the cats with orange peels, coffee grounds, and vinegar soaked cotton balls (all at different times). None of these remedies made a lick of difference. When the neighborhood cats decided it was potty time, if they were near my flower bed, they used it. Same went for my front door and stoop. Finally, our next door neighbor’s cat died, and that stopped a lot of the feline traffic.
I guess my pet peeve really boils down to this: People don’t consider how much their action affect their neighbors. These houses are about 20 feet apart. People act as though they are living alone in a hundred acre wood. Many things they do have an affect on their neighbors. Here are some examples:
~irresponsible pet ownership ( poop and run dog walkers, free range cats)
~talking and yelling in their back yard–20 feet from my bedroom window–at 3:00 am
~popping fireworks for 6 hours straight on New Years Eve and July 4th–we are outside city limits but the area is still densely populated
~failing to pick up garbage that has blown out of their trash barrels and onto other neighboring lawns
~leaving their children’s toys strewn over other people’s lawns instead of picking them up
Whew! It’s nice to be able to rant about this. Thanks for the space, Barbara. 😀
First thought when reading your comment is that you must live in MY neighborhood, Catie! I’m a townie with neighbors upclose and personal, and boy oh boy, but that can get very very touchy. (My closest neighbor is a 24/7 cigar smoker–not in his house, but out on his porch year-round, all weather, all hours. It’s gross and infuriating when I’ll sitting in my living room on a lovely summer evening and his never ending stinker cigar smells are curling through my window screens. Ick!)
I love your wandering dog pooper solution, but yeah, cats are a lot harder to deal with. We have a serious cat problem of equal frustration. I don’t get how cat owners can be so clueless. It’s just infuriating to find cat hair on the cushions of all my front porch furniture and smell all the spots they’ve marked in our shrubbery and flower gardens. Pitiful that it takes something as final as feline demise to slow the madness.
Hum…looks like I still have some unsettled peeves! Thanks for reminding me 😀
Similar to Richard. I cannot stand when people turn every conversation back to themselves. If I am sad about something that happened to me today and I mention it to you, please do not patronize me and then say that a thing that happened to you was much worse or exactly the same. I love the volley of conversation and love to hear about what others think and feel but when I’m in the middle of feeling something strongly, I don’t want to be one-upped by you. Whew! That did feel good.
Beautifully said and so true, Sara. Conversation is NOT supposed to be a competition, and certainly there are times we just need to shut-up and listen. There’s been times when I’ve found myself in the company of a genuine, true blue listener and I could just weep with gratitude! What a gift.